Thank you Glasses! :-|

As a kid I fancied spectacles, people wearing them amused me. Then there was a misconception that people wearing glasses are intellectuals, they have damaged their eyes by studying. I wished to be in that category but little did I know back then that I was being fooled. If I wear spects I will be termed as a genius. Even the parle-G kids “g=genius” used to wear those cute nerdy glasses sometimes. Once a dream , now a need. People using glasses are definitely talented, whether the two nerds winning the bournvita quiz competition or the singing sensation on the music competition (no idea how singing spoilt his/her eyes). Reading ‘My experiments with truth’ at the age of 9 never seemed like an achievement rather it created another misconception “Great men always wear spectacles.” Wait! I am not a great Gandhi fan just that my mom fooled me back then talking about freedom fighters,the Satyagraha moment and blah blah and made him a hero in my mind .. It was during my 10^th ICSE boards that I realised what a pain Mr Glasses has been, the longest chapter in history civics.(No offence intended)  Anyways the moral was that great people did not just burn midnight oil but their eyes aswell. And our dear doctors, how can I ignore them? They are supposed to be exceptionally brilliant and I rarely find a doctor without glasses. People with spectacles looked cool and at the same time nerdy. How much I wished I could use one! Sadly one day the wish got fulfilled. L

                          It was a time when I even wanted zero power glasses and now I am not a so proud owner of so many glasses unfortunately none are zero powered.  I don’t know what connection was there between my eyes and the unwanted headache, somehow I ended up with an eye test with a negligible negative power. This resulted in the fulfilment of a long awaited wish.  Now I also belong to the intellectual nerd category! But I was told I had spoilt my eyes because of television, computer, not eating green vegetables and reading novels while lying on bed. Huh! Every other person on earth using glasses was a sincere, hardworking and diligent student and I was none of it inspite of using nerdy glasses.  Anyways this did not kill the excitement afterall there were people in school who I had to show off my new look. ;) Some boys told me I looked like Preity Zinta from “kal ho na ho.” Boys always talk NONSENSE!!! The compliment comment or whatever it was did not matter. I felt the glasses made me look a year older and it was not even that fun using it all the time. And I hated it when girls in school would wear my glasses, go wow you really are blind, I don’t go up to someone who can’t walk, sit in their wheel chair and ask wow you really can’t walk. :\ What was meant for a constant use turned into a rare use.Glasses lost their charm very soon. Even trendy frames could not make me feel trendy. For one or two years it was always a rare use thing, till the letters on the blackboard seemed just like scattered white stuff.  Once again I became a proud owner of new glasses with a new range of power. The word constant use was never taken seriously. Again after a year or so I asked a girl sitting next to me in a class “can you see whatever is being projected on the screen? I find it difficult to read it I can’t see it properly.” I wondered how she was able to copy down everything this soon while I was struggling to even see one word. She replied in a cool manner “yea it is totally clear and visible.” So I had to depend on her i.e. copying down from her notes. It was time for another pair of new glasses. The damage was done. Constant use was now a must thing. The use has become this constant that now there are times I push up my glasses and realize I am not wearing any. And then there are times I use broken glasses and I am not even aware of it till it hurts my finger. This is what I call proper constant use. Not because I enjoy it but because I am blind without it. And I am so blind that sometimes I can’t make out if they are cracked.  :-P

                                                                                Glasses never add charm to your beauty rather they make you feel old with every passing day. And contact lenses come to your rescue. Not like they are damn comfortable but with time you get used to them. But it is something I avoid wearing to a 5 hours class and 8hours office. One of the basic reasons why people in my office and class ask me “Is that actually you on facebook? What happens to you when you come to office?” I become “behen ji.” K To make it worse working on a client’s system will make you feel more miserable. Sometimes I find my nose touching the computer screen. Crapped screen systems specially designed for auditors it seems. Sometimes I would be using contact lens and at the same time put up my glasses and panic “what the hell happened to my eyesight now?”:-O Damn I am so used to wearing glasses! But there is always a sense of happiness that almost all my close friends are “chasmish” :-D And there are some who are worried about the fact what they will do on their wedding, a pair of glasses never suits bridal attire. :-P I cannot imagine a day without my glasses. And the most difficult part “Eye Test.” I am still not sure if I am wearing the right powered spectacles.  :P Without glasses the whole reading box seems white and it is even more depressing when you stare at the reflecting mirror and you cannot even see your own face just a blurred face is visible. You are made to read with so many glasses and you are asked to choose the best. Seriously I have never been able to say which is the best. The doctor would ask “Is this good?Can you read? Read.” Then he would put up another glass and ask the same. If your answer is yes to both and you can read the letters then you are shot with another question “which is better?” And I don’t have an answer to that question, I keep saying “hmm maybe this no no maybe that hmmm.” Finally both of us would lose patience and I would blindly say yes this is better to one of the glasses. These days I don’t even say that I keep quiet and just “hmmm hmmm” till the doctor loses patience and selects one for me and asks me to read via both eyes. :P

                                     For people like me glasses are a basic necessity. No matter how careless I am the only thing that I handle with care are my glasses. This is dedicated to my dear glasses just to say “Thank you.”

The Happiness in earning a negligible Stipend! :P

“So how much are they going to pay you?” a friend asked me the day I joined office. This question made me realize I actually did not know how much they were going to pay me.                                        

“I don’t know I never asked them, stipend is the last thing I am concerned about. I am joining there to learn, to gain as much knowledge and experience as possible.” 

1 year later:

You lose Rs 100 per day per leave.
Our response :You can keep our whole stipend. Jitna toh dete ho! Huh!

At the client's office:

Client : So how much are they paying you??      

Me: Negligible!!

He laughs and says “I know that is why I did not join CA .”

Me: What?You did not join CA because of the articleship stipend??

Again he laughs his unique ahahahhah :\  

Client: No, I did not like the idea of being slogged and tortured for free for more than 3 years in the name of articleship and then appear for exams which you are not even certain of passing, so I pursued CFA. I did not wish to become bald doing CA.

His face at this moment reminded me of a "winking smiley" and my mind started racing did he mean that I would be bald by the time I become a CA? This was seriously the last thing I wanted to talk about early in the morning.

I smile and tell him "you are smart."

But the smart guy was not smart enough to realize that I am not blind, I could see even CFA had turned him bald. ;)

                        Initially stipend meant nothing even the first pay check could not cast any magical charm. Not till I got addicted to bournville and silk. A chocolate a day keeps stress away ;) Work helped me earn both stress and stipend. Stipend should be used to reduce stress. Simple logic!  Who would sponsor the weekend parties?? Had it not been the stipend? Well weekend parties are again stress reduction techniques and follow the same logic. With the amount of stipend we get one weekend party per month is at times difficult. At times even our travelling expenses are double the amount of what we get (thanks to the petrol prices!). Sigh!  

         And then for people like me who can actually hear a pair of shoes at a mall talking to them, begging them to take them and how lovely they would look on their feet!  Then there are people like my mom who would say “listen to the shoes already at home, they might feel neglected!” And who comes to save the poor shoes at the mall and fulfills their wish??Stipend! :D  And no matter how many shoes I buy I still don’t have anything to wear.  My shoes even ask me to get them a matching bag. To some extent stipend helps in satisfying all the unnecessary greed for shoes bags and what not!! ;) And obviously we cannot ignore our monthly phone charges. Thanks to stipend your parents know you don't waste time unnecessarily on phone. 

                                    One fine morning in the mid of a month I call up an office friend “Hey I was planning to colour up my hair this week sometime, maybe in the weekend. Even you wanted to colour up..so what say? This Sunday? "

She: yea I wanted to, but not possible this month. Stipend has still not been credited in our account and I have not paid my room rent yet!

Me: What the hell? Its already 15^th! No stipend! Are these people crazy?

She: Fund shortage maybe..!

Me: Then why make us work? We can stay at home they don’t have to pay us. 

                                       Back to the window shopping days. And to make it worse I have friends in other firms who would offer an ice cream and when I refuse “Yaar pata hai tum logon ko stipend nahi mili, you don’t have to pay. They make you slog for free. Sad!!.”  And then someday I get a message from a colleague “INSTIGATE all the articles we need to revolt.”  As if anyone is going to listen.These were the days when we would sit sipping a coffee at Cafe coffee day and wonder how life would be if our articleship gets extended, and a chorus reply to the thought "why not work as a waitress here?"This would definitely be a better thing to do.Morever a daily wage labourer earns more than us.   

                                     But trust me stipend really does not mean anything to us. We were here to learn, to gain experience. And this is what we have learnt from our experience nobody likes to get slogged for free. :P  Whatever meagre amount they pay me I don’t get it, I EARN it.

                                                                           

Being Sick!!

It is never a good feeling to be lying on the bed for the whole day with a hot water bottle popping pills and feeling sorry for yourself. It is one of those curl up and die days. I am not sure which part of my body hurts more. At around 3am I wake up freezing despite the blanket and the sweater and wonder if Damon actually can kill people in their sleep and if yes then it is the correct time he can do it now. It felt like death had chewed me up, ran over me like a freight train and is back for a second round.

 All this meant I was going to miss my morning class and I did miss it. It was not a good feeling to miss even one class of Forex. And ofcourse it meant no office aswell. But I did want a break from office and classes. And how much I missed my early morning sleep! But this is not exactly the way I thought I would get a break. Having breakfast, lunch and dinner on bed, something I perhaps missed. But these days I hardly get time for lunch at home forget having it on bed. Sleeping for hours on end ignoring the red light beeps on my blackberry is something I always wished I could do(not that I am that busy :P) and I finally did that. I don’t remember the last time I was this sick because since the day I have joined office I don’t remember taking any sick leave or rather despite being sick I had to work not because I love working but I badly needed to save my leaves for future. But with the amount of energy left in my body office seemed to be a distant dream sorry nightmare :P And finally a home alone experience after ages though all I could do was take random naps the whole day and curse the medicine companies for making bitter pills. L Do they ever taste the pills before selling? Bad customer service!! :P  Apart from that it seemed like there was an aching party inside my head and I was not invited to attend it. And all I could do was sleep get up eat sorry drink and sleep again. Liquid diet, another reason to worry about – weight loss!! Sigh! Despite all this being pampered by mom is something I missed. For 2 whole days I have not heard her complaining even once about my messed up room or whatever. :D

                  In between the naps I wonder how many hours I have been wasting like this. No office no classes yet I am not able to study. But I could not help it when every part of my body was out of order and there were no spare parts available. Finally mom woke me up from a sound sleep saying “look who is here.” All I could see via my blinking eyes were a bunch of beautiful yellow flowers. Oh wow flowers are here! :D Then I hear a chorus “Get well soon”!! Who says colleagues can’t be friends? Atleast in my case one of the few reasons I would ever like my office would be for the friends I have here. They surprised me, got me flowers and clicked my pictures definitely they are my people :P   Despite the weakness and the pain I could manage to sit, bitch and chit chat for hours about things that we will do once I am back in order. I even got the class notes I had missed that reminded me of school. After they left I slept again.

          

 Who says being sick is not fun? All you have to do is sleep, pop pills, get pampered, and get beautiful flowers, have lunch and dinner consisting of liquid diet on bed.... Still I cannot afford to fall sick again or waste my time and cry in pain!! 

LOL wala Government Job!! :-O

In this one year of work experience as an articled assistant I have realised there are three kinds of people- the first kind work because they like to work, the second kind work because they have to work or maybe forced to work  and the third kind work because others are working(they don’t like lagging behind). And trust me the third category consists mostly of girls :-P (neither they are forced to work nor are they interested but “hum kisi se kam nahi”) Then I have come across another category consisting of people who “work and do not work. “  You must be wondering what I meant by work and do not work.., well in their case work is rather a relative term, they normally do stuffs that is not really included in normal course of work but those are the stuffs that you find them doing most of the time. Hence they work and they do not work. And the people in this category are always satisfied with their job. Rescission never affects their job, they don’t get nightmares about pink slips, they don’t have deadlines to meet, they never have to spend sleepless nights on work, they can draw salary advance any time they wish, they can get leave anytime they wish, they are not bound by a particular office timing, they can come and go anytime they wish and they always have the “work is bliss” expression on their face. Wait did I forget the allowances?? Well yes they have every type of allowances you can think of. Welcome to Government Office!! Maybe these are the reasons why there is always a craze for government jobs.  Whatever I am going to write about government offices here do not really apply to all the government offices, but definitely the majority falling under this category belong to my State ofcourse :P (I mean no disrespect)

                 I really had some LOL experiences with Government clients. The first day I stepped into a Government office I was greeted with “they have sent a girl!!” The first thing I wanted to do then was punch the person hard on his face and say “yes look they have sent a girl!” But then I told myself ignorance is bliss! In this one year I have literally mugged up three lines “take it as an experience” “ignorance is bliss” and “patience”  Trust me it works J  Anyways no free gyan sessions over here let us get back to the place where I realised old men stalk more than young guys. The moment you enter till the moment you leave you find curious eyes following you everywhere. Your mind starts singing “mud mud k na dekh mud mud ke.”  But then you realise what can a person do when all he does is sit at a place and do literally nothing. If you reach the office at 10am it is like early morning for them you will rarely find anyone in the office.  As I said earlier they don’t have any particular workings hours or timing they come and leave as per their convenience. Their convenience might even mean coming at 12.30 pm and leaving at 3.30 pm which includes atleast one hour lunch break.  Initially you feel like all noble people work here for social causes like live green, they love trees that is why they save papers. Sometimes you cannot even take a print out of a trial balance and if the trial balance is of more than 5 pages (normally it is more than 5) you will get a look as if you just murdered 6 sheets of papers(or maybe trees that makes more sense), you are  a criminal. Ask them for one sheet of paper and they will ask you to write a requisition for that one sheet of paper. Again you need a paper to write a requisition. Most of your days will be spent on writing requisitions for files, ledgers, vouchers and sometimes even for a computer system or even for a chair to sit. Then you realise they don’t believe in the save paper save trees concept. When you write a requisition for a particular thing you have to make two copies one for them another your back up proof whatever. Your trial balance printout is a waste of 6 7 papers but the number of requisitions for every damn thing is never a waste!!

                  How can I miss the dear ladies working in a Government Office?! You really cannot make out much difference between them and a housewife. They come after 12.30 pm and you will rarely find them in the office after 3.30 pm. And in between their so called working hours they have important personal calls to make from the office phone. Their conversation might include star plus soaps to weddings, bitching and what not. Sometimes you might even find these aunties stalking you. That is the last thing you want there being stalked by women L  You might even come across some aunty who would ask you your bio data, give you free tips on maintaining flawless skin and then say “I am in search of a girl of your height for my son.” You stare at her with a blank expression. Never in your wildest dreams would you have imagined being indirectly proposed by a woman on behalf of her son!!  It is even more hilarious when these aunties ask you questions like “are you done with Sir’s internal audit??you were auditing him na?” oh yea I was internally auditing him!!These are the ROFL moments when you cannot help laughing right there on their face. During the lunch hour you hear live conversation and this time some of the uncles in the office join them. Their topic of discussion will either drive you crazy or sick. The ancestral property they could not inherit, the number of trees in their garden, the reason why they cannot pluck all the vegetables, the number of flowers that blossomed on their trees (they should rather be counting the number of mushrooms blossoming on their heads). Their debate consists of topics like kissan pineapple jam is made of papaya!

              You might even find people dozing off at any hour of the day. Your reaction “God unsophisticated people working in a sophisticated office!” But even the offices are not always classy or sophisticated. Sometimes the ceiling, fan and the walls might remind you of a black and white movie. There might even be a place inside the office used for spitting. You might even get to see dogs coming out of the office. And nobody really bothers as if it is very much normal for the dog to pay them a visit.  Did I miss out their ringtones?? Whenever someone’s phone rings your face might turn into the whatsapp surprised shocked smiley!!  And almost everyone out there would pronounce loan as “loon.”  And there will be days when you find garment exhibition right inside the office the seller would rarely have any buyers but definitely a large number of so called interested buyers will be present. You would wonder if your teacher ever told you that you were worse than a fish market then what would she tell them?! :O And it is worse when you are addressed as “stri loko” by someone.

            Sometimes they make work easier; you don’t get shocked to see their vast expenses on internet. You don’t have to bang your suspicious head on how they spend lakhs on internet expenses every month. When every employee is so much addicted to facebook and youtube and you are a witness to their addiction. Their day starts with star plus soaps on youtube and ends with colours. Almost every day atleast 30 to 40% of the employees must be on leave. Some or the other department must be closed. And at the end of the month they get a very “happy wala pay. “

            So is it the reason why people opt for government jobs?  Despite all the feel good provisions how many youngsters would like to get into such an environment? How many would like to work in such a culture? Change is a word that perhaps would never have any existence in such environment. But the craze for Government jobs will always remain the same. 

Friends-He or She?

They say a girl and a boy can never be best friends...I totally disagree with this fact specially when in my case the number of male friends is almost equal to the number of female friends  :-P  I have friends and I have best friends as well and I see no reason why a guy and a girl cannot be best friends. I believe both a male and a female friend are an essential balancing element in friendship. From the point of view of a girl let me tell you why ;)

Time 2am: Call up your female best friend and you get to hear a lovely voice saying “your call is on wait as the person you are trying to reach is on another call please stay online or call after sometime.” The voice might be lovely but the words it spoke were not especially at such an hour. You hear the whole sentence again and again. And if you are calling up a bsnl subscriber then you don’t really listen to the whole sentence and disconnect the call as they don’t fall under the lovely voice category. Anyways no matter how many times you call you will be greeted with a call waiting message instead of a hello! And if you are lucky in a day or two she will definitely text you back “hey gal!!sup?soo sorry sweetieee u had called and I missed it..I was on a call with xyz (her boyfriend ofcourse) and you know sometimes he can be an ass thoda tension tha so cdnt take your call..what happened??catch up soon baby muuuaahh “  

 Time 2am: Call up your male best friend you might get to hear the call waiting message here as well but rare possibilities. And after 1 or 2 calls you are surely going to get a reply not because your friend cares or likes talking to you more than his girlfriend but because he is sensible enough to understand that you are not jobless enough to call someone just like that at 2 am. Even if he doesn’t answer your call you will definitely receive a text. And if the phone just rings and there is no answer from the other side either he is asleep, with friends, drunk, playing or doing something important. And in the morning you will surely get a message or call from him.At any time of the day your friend calls up and you don’t receive. If the caller happens to be a girl she would call you up again or leave a text or make sure that you get back to her once free. If it is a guy, now it is an end of the world she did not receive my call!!How dare she hurt my ego?

            Suddenly you want to party or maybe just go out and have fun and you call up your friends, do they turn up? Well yes if it is him he would happily say “yea sure will be there in 15minutes” and if it is her “you should have told me yesterday? How can I go out all of a sudden? I don’t think mom will allow.” Hang out with your guy friends and you lose all the handsome stalkers you wished to be stalked by :P but definitely you attract a new range of stalkers called aunties who give you the “stay away from my son look.”  The benefit of going out with your female friends is you can share girlish jokes about stalkers ;) And if you have more than two or three male friends and you have photos with them on facebook you are lucky because all the jobless rumourmongers in the world get confused who to hook you up with. Now pictures on facebook reminds me of one thing a girl likes your picture because you liked hers! Funny but true! I am sure many of us must have experienced this. And a guy clicks like when he actually likes it or maybe he would not ‘click like’ even if he likes it.   

                             It is really important to have both he and she with you whenever you are high :-P Once you start drinking she will always encourage you with one more one more..while he would always restrict you that is enough but once you are high it is him who would like to listen to your blabbering and laugh and now it will be her who would start cursing herself for letting you drink so much! And if you happen to puke he will just disappear and of course she will stay with you with a glass of water or may even make you a black coffee if needed. But later he will call you up and say you are hilarious and cute and she would say you are a nightmare when high. If you feel like you are freezing to death due to an air conditioner and you ask your friends sitting near you to turn it off, a girl would never do that she would just say “it is suffocating without an AC.”  And a guy would either increase the temperature or turn it off no matter how suffocating it is. Another interesting fact, your best friend will be your best friend till she becomes somebody’s girlfriend and your best friend will be your best friend just to become somebody’s boyfriend. He might pamper you with chocolate filled talks and everything just to help him woo a girl. She would make you go crazy asking you a thousand times what to wear what to say just to impress him and she would never ask you anything sweetly, rather demand it as her fundamental right. She has all the time in this world to meet him but not you and you know why? Because her mom knows that she is with you all the time. And that means you get bored all the time while her parents think what a jobless friend our daughter has!!The less you see her, the less you hear from her but definitely once in a month you will get a call from her “I broke up with him.” And you console the crying soul that they will get back together in a day or two and she would be stubborn with a “no this is final.” After a day you will get to know from her facebook update and photos that she has patched up. With time the break up calls will also decrease so will the hangouts and everything. There is a reason for that aswell “her boyfriend does not like it.” Poor soul!(thank God I am single)!!And for a guy once he has the girl you helped him to woo in his court he has to play it safe. A female best friend definitely has to become just a good friend, no matter how much he flirts around. The best part is his parents will never think that you are jobless. He knows how to manage his personal and social life. Though the frequency of calls and texts might have decreased but even after ages when you meet up you don’t really find any major changes. And yes they might also be having the monthly break up scheme thing but they would not be remembering you then either they manage themselves or they have other “GUY” friends who would understand it better. But he will remember you when he needs to buy her a gift and perhaps that is the only time he might be a patient shopper.

                  

Can you imagine how it would have been without your girl friends? The bitching, the gossiping and all those fun, the girlish stuffs..who would have helped you with shopping? The mehndi sessions just like that, the fun tattoos, the nail paints, pajama parties and all that hhee hee hooo hoo!! Who would have understood your achievement when you hit a boy on the face ;) Who would have appreciated your new shoes, your new hairdo, and helped you with what to wear for a party or even just for a coffee. And all the smileys in the world would have been a waste without them after al who would have understood and communicated with you through them. And the word “Awwwwww” what would have happened to it? When you have a new crush who would have reacted with an “Awwwww you have a new crush awwww he is haaawwwtt!!”  Tell your male friends that you have a crush on a certain guy and the typical reaction “ lol!he is a gay.” As if they are the only He-Men in the world. And if you do not find a guy interesting then your standards are too high according to them.  If you are technically challenged like me what would have you done if you did not have any male friends? Who would have helped you fixing up your broken pc or selecting a new phone. Who would have fought with you continuously, teased you every moment, insult you and at the same time make you laugh and even sometimes make you forget that you are on a diet. No matter how many times you say the words cheap and disgusting you still laugh at his dirty and poor jokes.

At the end all one can say is “ har ek friend zaruri hota hai” ;) 

P.S. the above “He” refers to male friends not boy friends :P 

MOM!

I still remember the first time I gifted mom something on mother’s day which she actually liked and has preserved till now. I was eight years old then and I came to know about mother’s day through telekids which used to be my favourite newspaper back then. The first gift which she still preserves must definitely be special. It was a poem dedicated to her. I had written it myself.  Today if I see that I am like “haha” I was a kid I used sparkles colours everything to make it look beautiful, but what my mom found beautiful was my piece of writing. Since then I have never written any poems dedicated to anyone other than myself :-P  With time the handmade cards n poems were replaced with archies cards and gifts. I am the kind of person who can spend her whole month’s salary on a single day just to buy someone special a birthday gift, even if that meant I have to survive with a loan later. But even that never impressed my mom. (Though I am not employed and don’t get a salary for the time being you can say it is my stipend or savings) With time the gifts became better and better but every time she would just say thank you and the same dialogue “ all I want from you is that type of poem that you wrote for me once .” For the last 14 years perhaps I have been listening to the same thing “why didn’t you write me something?” Even the best of bags and shoes didn’t make her happy. I can’t say she was not happy but definitely it was never the best gift she expects every year whether on her birthday or mother’s day. She does not like the stuff written on an archies card because she knows I did not write it. But how can I write a poem like that? I am no more an eight year old kid? But then she must be expecting me to write even better. With the present state of mind if I start thinking of writing a poem on mom it might start with something like

My phone A/C    Dr

         To mom’s bank account

(purchase of cell phone for me)

I am sure nobody on earth would want to read such a poem except for CA articles :-P  And to some extent I feel shy. I mean cmon she is my mom she knows I love her why do I need to show that off on a piece of paper. For an eight year old it is always easier to pen down her thoughts and express her love in words for someone she loves. But once you grow up don’t you feel shy? I really can’t write stuffs like roses are red sky is blue blah blah blah...and I love you... With time I might find a bit awkward to say I love you mom just like that but my mom does not. She would keep saying “you people won’t understand a mother’s love concern.”  My brother’s reaction “stop watching star plus soaps” and my reaction lol!! There was a time when a good night kiss was a must thing for me. I would kiss her good night and mom was forced to do the same. I don’t know when this trend stopped. Maybe the day I became nocturnal. And whenever I left home whether for school, college or anywhere a goodbye flying kiss was must. But I clearly remember when this thing stopped, since the day I joined office. Why? Maybe because I never really leave home I actually rush to my office. The only thing that my mind would be occupied with is hell is waiting! She is the person who gets up daily at 5am just to make sure I have my breakfast and I take something along to eat. I slog from 6am to 8pm these days which includes my 4 hours classes and it scares her more. Back home she would always say you don’t have to over work you can leave this..That is something I am never in a mood or condition to listen to.  Sometimes when I am asleep or am trying to get up from bed almost pissed off with everything she would hug and kiss me saying you work really hard. Thank God someone notices.

                 It is true I argue the most with her as I am as short tempered and impatient as she is. There might be times when I don’t apologize for the way I retorted back but that does not mean I don’t care or I am not sorry. I know I can never be like her. I still remember the week when she was out of station and I sort of had to manage the house, trust me it is a herculean task.  She might not always support me with my decisions but she never compelled me to do things her way or impose her opinions on me. She has always let me live my life the way I want to. Anyways this is all I came up with when I tried writing a poem for her birthday. I am not sure if it at all makes sense. But this is for the person who I can run to at any moment of my life, the person whom I love the most, and who loves me unconditionally no matter what, though she loves my brother more than me . She might again tell me the same thing “you should have written something for me.”  And I guess I am not showing this to her. I might not have been the perfect daughter she might be expecting out of me but I know I love her the way a perfect daughter does. 

 Happy Birthday to the person who gave me the best gift ever – My life!!

A farewell on the death of a favourite friend!

Call it addiction, love or mere stupidity, but yes I miss my cell phone. I wake up in the morning and I feel like I am missing something. I know there is something not right, and it takes me a while to remember what it is..then I remember. My dear friend is gone.

                                                        It was always the first thing I saw the moment I opened my eyes every morning. Of course it was my wake up alarm.It knew when I had to get up at 5 and when at 8. And it provided me with the easiest way to snooze and dismiss the alarm just by a soft touch. It was always the last thing I saw before sleeping, it even told me exactly for how many hours I was going to sleep (saved me from manual calculation which I do now L) It rested under my pillow. Inspite of wearing a watch I would still search for my phone when I needed to see the time. I miss all the lovely pictures that flashed every time a dear one called up or texted. We were so inseparable that anywhere I go these days I am greeted with the same query where is your phone? It is dead!!Now that sounds even more painful. These are the times when I miss it even more. Seems like it has even made a lasting impression on the people around me. Even my friends in office console me like I lost a very good friend of mine and that just makes me realize that I was actually so damn attached to it that anyone around me could notice the void it has created. Lunch hours at office gets terribly boring without it, I miss the beauty with brains group on whatsapp. The weird part is I don’t miss talking to anyone or staying in touch with anyone, I just miss it. I miss holding it, I miss touching it just like that, and even my pillow misses it. It was a dear friend, it never complained no matter how many times I dropped it. It had been a witness to all my mood swings. It was there when I was happy sad angry. Irrespective of everything no matter how carelessly I treated it, it was there right beside me. It was perhaps the best company I had when I was bored. I find it weird how can I possibly get so attached to a non living thing? It cannot be me! I have never been like this.. It was just a mobile phone, and not even my first cell phone. I don’t know why it is so special. I would not lie but yes for the first time I long to see my own picture i.e. the wallpaper of my phone. Now that it is gone with a negligible or nil chance of coming back I can’t even find a proper replacement. I must have searched for so many phones for the last two weeks but nothing can just replace it. That just makes me feel even worse. What the hell is wrong with me? What am I searching for? A perfect phone? And nothing seems to be perfect for me like the perfect one I had. Or maybe I just cannot get over it. I can get myself a better phone maybe, but the heart stays where it is attached to no matter what.

                             I still remember its last words “quietly brilliant” and all I wished to say was RIP – Return if possible!