Generation Gap

Every time I meet my granny (mom’s mom) she always has one thing to complain about for sure my clothes! Personally I find nothing wrong with my clothes, but then she has these small issues with my clothes why do I wear skinny jeans? How do I manage such tight jeans? Why do I wear short skirts and frocks? And I end up showing her the weirdest clothes (trust me they are not weird) I have and I enjoy the expression on her face. Then she shoots a question at mom “how do you allow her to wear such clothes and go out?” I still remember her expression when she saw the top I wore for my fresher’s seriously there was nothing wrong with it but she found it weird. Well is this what we call generation gap? Or is it just that we live in an era which is quite alien to her. In her times definitely girls were just into the traditional Indian wear saris. She is not used to seeing girls getting dressed up in the way they do now. I don’t take her comments seriously but I enjoy them and whenever I get a chance I love to flaunt and tease her. But I could have concluded that that she is conservative narrow minded and blah blah..but no she is just not used to it. My mom did not grow up wearing the type of clothes that I wear and then suddenly when my granny sees her granddaughter in skinny jeans and tees or maybe shorts she is not comfortable with this change. She finds it strange when mom allows me to wear short dresses and go to a friend’s party. The change that my granny could not accept my mom could. She gave me the freedom to wear the type of clothes I want but then subjected to many restrictions I must say. These restrictions were imposed on me just to protect me I know but I could not accept that easily. A Capri and a funky message t shirt is what I find to be cool and just the perfect thing for me!!A kurta and jeans is what my mom finds to be descent and just the perfect fit for me!! Whenever we go shopping most of the time we end up getting nothing for me and whenever we do buy it is after a strenuous search for almost 2 or 3 hours trying to find a combination of cool+descent outfit :O and finally when we lose patience one of us compromises.

Few days back I was having a chat with a friend regarding these new changes and the generation gap. It started when she said that her younger brothers are into dating right from standard 8th and are always into late night talks. The first thing I asked her was they are in standard 8th and already have a personal cell phone? I remember in are times both of us were given personal cell phones when we left school. We were 16 then. And now kids get cell phones in class 8th. She was completely against this idea of a standard 8th kid using a cell phone and indulging into late night talks. But then can we blame the kids??Is it their fault?ofcourse not!! We have been through the same stage the only difference is that the mistakes which we committed when we were 16 they are committing it when they are just 13. And at such a point of time you can’t even stop them. They will make mistakes and learn from them. That is the beauty of teenage. She told me that even standard 7 8 students go pubbing and have perhaps tasted every damn drink. At this point I was not sure whether I should be shocked or sad about the fact that I am 21 and have no real idea about pubbing. I have never been to a ‘real pub.’ Well it’s true that I and my friend were sitting at a pub only discussing all this but then it was in the afternoon there was no dj! forget the dj we did not even have music not a single person out there and we were just munching potato wedges and chit chatting. If this is what you call a real pub and pubbing then yes I have been to a pub. My friend was not able to accept all this. She was not against it but she kept saying one thing ‘there is an age for everything; this is just not the right time.’ This sentence just reminded me of my parents they used to say this to me every other day a few years back. I could not help smiling. I was not allowed to have a facebook account till I turned 16 but now even a 9 year old has a facebook account. At that point of time even I could never understand why my parents restricted me from all this but now I can clearly see the reason. All of a sudden she told me ‘Anks I am really scared!!Things that I did after I turned 18 my younger brothers are repeating the same when they are just 13! I wonder 20 years from now what will be my children doing? They will be having a personal cell phone right from standard 3, they will start dating from kindergarten itself. My daughter might end up wearing a bikini and walk casually to college?:O Shit!! What will I do? I mean off course I won’t let all this happen. I won’t be giving a cell phone to my kids till they are done with their high school. I won’t let my daughter wear any such crap but then things are changing so fast..Who knows what will happen...” I just stared at her with a blank expression. Pretty obvious whatever she was saying did not make any sense to me. I have never ever thought about my kids sorry I meant would be kids :P she just now told me the unpredictable future of her would be kids.

Back home I wondered if whatever she said was actually going to happen. But who cares what will happen 20 years from now. She said we would not let our kids use a cell phone till they are done with their high school. But will that be possible 20 years from now? What if all the moms in this world don’t think in similar ways? How will I be able to stop my 8 year old kid to have a cell phone when all his/her classmates have one? How would he or she feel at that time? What would they think of their parents? Will they be able to understand why we avoid or restrict them from doing things that might seem pretty cool to them but not to us? It would just end up like he or she becomes an arrogant little shit and I become a terrible old fashioned conservative mom. A friend once told me “I can’t understand why the elders always criticise our generation? What exactly is wrong with us? And before criticizing they should once think that they are actually criticizing their upbringing.” So does that mean the way we shape them that is exactly how they become? But practically is that possible? I don’t believe it. I remember I read this somewhere written by George Orwell “Each generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one that went before it, and wiser than the one that comes after it.” No matter how much we try to make them the person we want them to be, at the end they become themselves. Maybe they will benefit more from the lessons that they learn from their mistakes and blunders. We should just let them fly after being sure that they have learnt the proper way to use their wings. But how badly I wish our parents thought the same :P

Seriously at times I wonder why I am so different from everybody. Why is it that my thinking process my way of seeing things are so damn different from my parents? If I am trying to put myself in their shoes and understand their point of view why can’t they do the same? I am not saying they are wrong but rather than terming me as the one who is immature and stupid can’t they for a few minutes see life from my eyes? Maybe the term called generation gap can be bridged if we and the generation before and after us try to see and understand things by walking in each other’s shoes. A thing that might have seemed absurd in one generation might become wisdom in another. I don’t know if the changes that we are about to notice in the next generation are for the better or worse whatever they are we are supposed to accept it and move on.