“Arey!!Long time! You still look the same..So when is your
son getting married?” This is definitely
not something that I am going to ask a friend 30 40 years from now if I happen
to bump into him or her at a shopping mall. But this is what a lady asked my
mom and she happens to be my mom’s friend and I don’t know how good friends
they are or rather were but definitely they had met after ages. And she
continues with her blabbering “these days it is so hard to find single nice
girls, every other girl has a boyfriend. So better hurry up! Find a beautiful
daughter in law. But it is always a relief if your children themselves select
their partners that is a relief and sometimes a headache but definitely
relieves us from the headache of hunting for a well settled and educated son in
law and a beautiful daughter in law. Arey she is your daughter?? She is so
slim!!What does she do? When will she get married?” And the next question is
directly fired at me “so you have a boyfriend?” You seriously need a doctor dear lady! My mom
answers the boyfriend query which was even more depressing “she is doing CA so
no scope for a boyfriend, and a tension for me God knows when she will be
completing her education and by the time she settles down don’t know what must
have happened to me.” The worst part
about such a situation is you have to fake a smile and pretend as if you just
love this awesome conversation. People still think our generation does not know
how to start and hold a conversation. I can bet I could have had a much more
sensible conversation than this. It is still acceptable for the lady mentioned
above to talk about all this, she being a friend was “just curious and
concerned.” But it is even worse with the ladies you come across in jewellery
shops. Jewellery shops- a nightmare for me, I mean it. It is awkward when
almost all the jewellery shops of the city happen to be my clients (I mean my
boss’s clients ofcourse) . whenever I visit a jewellery shop with mom I am sure
every damn sales person out there thinks I will be getting married in a few
months time. I don’t blame them. Anyone can get that misconception by listening
to the way my mom talks to me asking me which one I like most. Neither it is a
book shop nor a shoe showroom why would I like any of the stuff that she shows
and asks me if I like it? Sometimes it
is even worse “won’t it look good on you if you wear on your wedding?” Now when
on earth am I getting married? From where did this come from? Maybe the tanishq
advertisement might have made my mom think that jewellery would make me imagine
my wedding. How lame! I just look at her and say “take whatever you like I am
not going to wear any of that.” I see her pissed off expression to my pissed
off reaction. But that reminds me of the day when I bought a hot pant and she
said no matter what she would not let me wear it and go anywhere. Tit for tat!
;) Well I really never have to make a choice or say I like it because there are
so many ladies out there shopping who love to give free advises. Before I can
answer someone sitting next to mom would be more interested to see what we are
buying leaving whatever she was trying out. “It is beautiful, are you taking it
for your daughter in law? Look at this I got this long necklace for my daughter
in law, the wedding will take place next month, she is in Dubai. I thought she
would be getting this type of stuff so I have to exchange it for something
else. I had gifted her diamond set on their engagement.” I wanted to ask her
“are we getting an invitation card?’:P
Then she started blabbering tips on what to get for a daughter, daughter
in law and son in law. Perhaps sons don’t wear jewellery. :P Finally when she
noticed my presence there was a question so you are taking this for her
wedding? “GOD!” Can’t these people think of anythingelse? :-O Finally when I am totally pissed off I just
walk out of the showroom and wait outside.
And how can we miss the family functions? Someone or the
other must be getting married or maybe about to get married and somewhere it is
your turn next. And then there are so many uncles and aunties who are always
more concerned about us than their own children. And the funny part they see us
once in a blue moon at some so called family function where we are actually
forcefully dragged by our parents. “Your son has a girl friend and you don’t
know??When will they get married?” Then your parents have that feeling “oh god
the whole world knows and we don’t!” I
wonder why the so very confident uncles and aunties do not talk about their
dear son and daughter’s love life. Not like our parents are not aware of what
is cooking up in the respective uncle aunties’ chunu munu’s lives but they
would never ask or talk about them. It
was even more interesting when my maid asked me when I will be completing my
education and getting married. And my reply made her say “yes these days girls marry
late, career is their first priority.” Even a cousin of mine told me that I
should be marrying early, especially if I don’t have a boyfriend. Two years
from now will be the apt age for getting married. And the reason is if you
marry late you don’t get good guys, you get the left overs . What is the
guarantee that you don’t get a second hand third hand or maybe a left over only
even if you marry early? I mean you cannot guarantee anything. She advised me
to get myself a boyfriend, so that even if I marry late I would have the best
option as per my preference. Point noted. Conclusion- whatever! I remember the first time I had cooked at home
when my mom was out of the city for a few days and my granny was praising me
and appreciating the little I did to a family friend and the lady just looked
at me and said “what is the big deal? That is what every girl has to do after she
gets married?” Really? Is that the
reason why you got married? A few kind words could have just made me happy and
perhaps the next time you had visited I would have cooked something for you. But
forget it you are married you can cook for yourself and eat.
Sometimes it is like you were born just to get married at some
point of time. And then your parents have the feeling that it is time they should
be done with their responsibility of getting you married. The sooner the better
maybe..
I never grew up
dreaming of a prince charming on a white horse, rather a wizard on a broomstick
sipping butter beer and then it turned into a vampire on a silver Volvo exploring
the world in the wink of an eye.. ;) I
find it funny when couples behave stupid in a book store holding hands and the
stupid mushy talks and trust me it is always the girl who behaves stupid. :P It
is more fun to be a spectator to such a nuisance than playing the dumb girl
holding hands and being mushy with a guy in a bookstore. (Love birds no offence
intended, but kindly find a better place) So is it what my cousin meant how my
life would be if I had a boyfriend? It feels better dreaming of owning a
bookstore like that having all my favourite world class novels. (Don’t get me
wrong I am not unromantic :P ) What
exactly did she want to say that 2 years from now would be the apt age for
getting married? I would not be looking that old? I can find a nice guy who is
not a left out sorry left over or whatever? But who can guarantee that two
years from now if at all I get married the guy would be a clean sheet I mean a
prince out of fairy tale. Practically and frankly speaking it does not matter
who you get married to what matters is you live happily ever after with that
person. It does not matter how many girls he has dated before, what matters is
I being the last. Whoever is reading this knows very well how difficult it is
to get a guy like in movies “still waiting for my dream girl types” and trust
me these days even if you come across such guys you end up thinking is he gay?
All these years he never had a crush how is that possible? :P And moreover it is not that easy to get a guy
who will let me have a hookah bar at our place on an open terrace with Egyptian
light fixtures.( I am serious!!)
Few days back a friend told me “every time I meet you, I am amused.
You are so different.” I took it as a compliment and told him” yea I am different
I also feel I don’t fit in anywhere.” But then I come to know by different he
meant to ask if I am straight. :\ what made him raise such a doubt? He laughed
and said “ almost all my friends who are of our age are either dating someone or
are in a committed relationship and few have also planned up to settle down in
2 years time and here I see you single no crushes nothing.” What do I tell
about my crushes, my last crush was on a hot and handsome guy who I stalked
like crazy and came to know he was divorcee. :-O :P They say there is an apt
age for getting married (for both a girl and a guy). Personally I believe age
is just a number and in what way can a number judge your maturity? One should
get married when he is ready to do so. It does not matter if he or she is 24 or
28 or even 30. I like enjoying my mud chocolate pastry alone and I would not
ever like the fact that I am forced to share it with someone just because
everyone believes that eating it all alone is not a good thing. Why not give me
the time to get bored of eating alone? And then I might not mind sharing it
with someone. When my mom asked me what I would like to wear on my wedding it
irritated me maybe because I am not yet matured or ready to even think about
getting married. Maybe if she had asked few years from now when I feel it is
time to settle down I might have given her a list of things I would like. Once you are done with your education and you
have a job, if you are a guy you will always be asked to earn and save get
yourself a house and get married. And if you are a girl work for a year or two
then all your decisions will be based upon whoever you are going to marry,
starting from which city you have to live in to where you have to work or maybe
not work. Maybe the guy did not really want to buy a house at that point of
time or maybe the girl did not want to quit her promising career. But they had
to because it was the apt age according to others for settling down. But the
first thing I would like to do once I complete my studies will be going down to
GOA!! :D (Besties who are interested ping me after a year :P) I look forward to
so many more exciting stuffs to do in my life like opening up a hookah bar(yes
I know it is banned!!Does not matter I and my hubby will have it on our terrace
you can join :P) , a tattoo parlour and a spa! Earning as much as possible and
spending them on road trips and on travelling the whole world. Rafting, scuba
diving, sky diving and so much more. And maybe writing a book on how to run a
successful hookah bar and how to survive 3 years of articleship or maybe how to
screw up your relatives :P I find all this more exciting than the whole idea of
getting married. K
If our elders so much believe in the whole concept of
getting married on time and everything then they should also believe in the
saying that marriages are made in heaven. If they actually are made in heaven
why make the whole thing complicated? When the angels in heaven are ready to sing
the wedding bells will definitely ring. ;)
